I love the iPad. It’s perfect for reading the news in bed, watching my tv series on long flights, and using it as a bribe to get my kids to do all sorts of stuff. But I tell you, no one is as obsessed with the iPad as is my husband, unless we’re talking about my friends’ husbands, that is. What is it with men? Why is it that they always have to be playing with their…iPad? Who would have ever thought that in the 21st century we would be competing with an electronic device for our husbands’ attention?
Let’s face it, for countless generations women lived with the knowledge that men had roving eyes (and hands and other body parts). Cheating men were so common that my grandmother used to tell my mom that as long as a man did not “keep” a woman, the occasional cheating was not only to be ignored but to be expected. So I guess that we should be glad that our husbands’ eyes are frequently roving over a 7.31 x 9.50 inch device and that their roving fingers are tapping, pinching, sliding over and swiping…a flat surface. Yes, I guess we should be happy, but could it be that, in effect, the iPad is the 21st century’s mistress? I mean don’t you sometimes think that your husband spends more time on and with the iPad than on and with you?
You think I’m exaggerating? Knowing me, it’s possible But, let’s see, how many times have you had to pry an iPad from your husband’s hands so that you can have an actual conversation with him? How often have you seen your husband grab his iPad the minute he wakes up, or fall asleep in bed with the iPad on his lap? Does it seem that he just can’t live without it? You know it, he LOVES his iPad.
We might be competing with an electronic device for our husbands’ attention, but the competition is nonetheless fierce. I can even understand the infatuation. She’s very intelligent, and quick thinking. She’s sleek and elegant. She can be playful or serious. She has a bright and colorful personality, and she’s a pleasure to touch. She’s also extremely accommodating accepting to be hushed with the slightest of gestures. How can we ever compete?
Our only hope is that she gets displaced by something greater and nicer so that our husband’s attention can be yanked away, re-directed to something else, giving us a chance to grab it. The good news is that this is about to happen: tomorrow. The bad news is that this greater, nicer “something” is the new iPad3 and apparently it’s so incredible that he will “really have to see and touch [it].” With the iPad2 my husband was virtually gone, but somehow iHad him still. What will happen now? Methinks iSad, maybe even iMad (with jealousy). Only one thing left to do, when you can’t beat them join them: iBuy one.